2017-01-07 Clint and Nat in Gym
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"Alright, you know the drill. Identification and voice confirmation."

When the average citizen thinks about S.H.I.E.L.D., they probably imagine one of the agency's many fine agents. But it'd perhaps come as a surprise that most of the people who work for S.H.I.E.L.D. have never even 'taken' the Field Agent Test, let alone passed it. We've already discovered that some of these non-agents work in the motor pool, or as security guards. However, there is yet another highly-coveted job for those who want all the perks of working for S.H.I.E.L.D., without any of the pesky stress or risk of injury.

We're talking, of course, about the guy who runs the gym.

The bald, very in-shape guy behind the station barely looks up from his datapad as a new agent comes to check in. He taps the screen a few times, before handing the pad over to the agent in question.

Placing his fingers on the screen, the agent looks about as bored by the process as the check-in guy does. The screen scans his fingerprints into the system, and takes god only knows what other readings in the process.

"Barton, Clint. 253519987."

The screen flashes green, and the gym check-in guy takes the datapad back. "You're good to go, Agent Barton. Please dispose of all paper cups in the appropriate receptacle, and don't forget to wipe down any surfaces that you sweat on."

Agent Barton can't help but smile as he goes through the futuristic whooshing door that separates the gym from the rest of the facility. "No promises, Chief. I sweat a LOT."


Natashw was already in the gym. She had her red hair tied back in a ponytail that was stuck through the back of a black ballcap that was ontop of her head. She was wearing black exercise clothing, a sports bra and some black lycra pants and a pair of bright crimson red running shoes on her feet.

When Barton showed up, she heard the voice of the man at the door and she looked over at him. "Well, there he is… come to sweat with the rest of us." She teased him lightly. She herself, was in front of a punching bag and had been pummeling it fiercely moments before.

Natasha stepped back from it and went to grab her water bottle off of a black metal stool. She lifted it up and sipped from it while watching Clint make his big arrival.


Salty old agent that he is, Clint's gym ensemble is fairly minimal. Some S.H.I.E.L.D.-issued athletic gear, slighly more stylish than the stuff that the Army uses, but only slightly. Fortunately, S.H.I.E.L.D. doesn't believe in Ranger panties.

He finds an out of the way spot to drop the small purple gym bag with 'Hawkeye's Bag. Fuck off.' written in black Sharpie pen. He quickly drops the hoodie that was keeping him warm in the normally-frosty facility, now that he's planning to get some actual physical activity done.

"Oh, I've been sweating plenty already today. Hill made sure that a prostate examp got added to my reactivation physical. Doctor Aja has small fingers, fortunately…"


Natasha watched the man as he carried his stuff over and sat it all down. She carried her water bottle and followed after him with a lopsided grin. "I may have suggested that exam be added to your return rudnwon." She idly added after he spoke of the prostate exam. She took a swig of her water and watched him.

"You look like you faired through it well enough though." She continued to grin. Her head shook softly then. "Everyone is glad to have you back though. So I'm just teasing you. I don't want you to feel like we're picking on you though. Its just our way of saying… 'Hey, we missed you.'" She paused shortly. "It might be a horrible way to do that though… we should just try a box of chocolates sometimes. That would probably be much better."

She smirked and went to sit down near where he sat his bag down. "Where did you get the money to buy that car anyway?" She asked, lifting her water up again while staring at him from under the brim of her black hat. "Are you selling drugs? Can I get in on that action?"


"Hey, can't be too careful when you get my age. But according to Doctor Aja, everything is clean as a whistle. Which… kind of makes me never want to use a whistle ever again."

Fun Fact: Hawkeye's gym bag definitely contains a whistle. After all, he's been an instructor at S.H.I.E.L.D. Academy the past year and change.

He looks a bit perplexed by Natasha's question though, as if he thought the answer was incredibly obvious. "Money? Did you not… wow."

Holding up his hands in a protective Krav Maga stance, Clint throws a very slow air-punch in Natasha's general direction. "I mean, I know you're a communist, so you don't quite get the free market. But I would have thought you at least understood branding, marketing, and promotional deals."

A few more air-punches, as he starts circling her playfully. "After all, the 'Avengers' is a trademarked brand. So is 'Hawkeye.' Which means I get a piece of every purple action figure they sell at Wal-Mart."


Natasha used just her non-water-bottle-holding hand to deflect his mocking punches at her as she smirked at listened at his words.

"Yeah, well… I turned all of those such things down." She replied. "Thats why any action figure that may bare a resemblance to me, is named 'And Their Girl' or 'Token Boobs'." Her dry sense of humor at its fullest at the moment.

"Besides, the communist in me is far more in-belief that I should get as much of a cut of your sales as I do of everyone else's." Nat's green eyes watched him move and she continued to deflect any slo-mo punches thrown at her.

"I thought you spent all of your money on booze and whores though. I see to recall, that one time in Bangkok…" She trailed off, sipped from her water. "Didn't you complain about a 'burning sensation' for like a year after that?" Her red brows were now furrowed a bit as she tilted her head while staring at him.


"That's where you're wrong, my dear Tasha. Now that I'm an Avenger I get free drinks. And now that I've been voted Third Sexiest Avenger by Cosmopolitan, I get free… other stuff."

Clint is far from a prude, but for some reason he feels a bit awkward saying the word 'sex' anywhere near Natasha. Alluding is one thing, frank discussion is another.

Of course, Natasha has no such compunctions. "Which woulda come in handy in Bangkok, if we hadn't been undercover. I still haven't forgiven you for using all my condoms when we were supposed to be undercover as a married couple, by the way."


"I have needs." Natasha replied to him after hearing his condom complaint. She sipped her water again then and leaned back on the bench she was seated upon.

"So if you're third… then I guess that means Cap is number one and… Thor is two?" She asked of him with a sly smirk. "I would've thought Stark would get slapped into third, on this list." Another soft tease for the middle aged man in his midlife crisis to enjoy.

"But honestly… I'm glad to see you having fun." And she said that with one hundred percent sincerity. "You've been tossed around a lot over the years… Stark has his toys, Thor does whatever Thor's do… Cap enjoys, leather bound books. But you? You've seemed to be more distraught than the others. So I'm glad you're having a good time out there. Taking advantage of all your free swag." She grinned lightly once more.


"Actually, I was a little surprised by the ranking. Cap was number four. Tony was number FIVE. Top two spots went to Thor and Hulk. But the readers of Cosmo have never actually SMELLED either of them, so I guess it makes sense…"

One day, years from now, they'll catalogue the Avengers based entirely on how good they smell. Hawkeye will still likely come in third…

"It's been nice this past year. A mostly nine to five schedule. Time to enjoy myself. Royalty checks. But it feels a little bit like… empty fun, I guess? The other Avengers have all their 'other' stuff, but workaholics like you and me can't really ever relax. Not really."


"Relaxing is when I feel like I am at my worst." Natasha said with a previous smile given to his jokes about the ranking numbers. "Its when people want to try to 'get to know me' and thats when I start realizing that I really can't stand myself and don't want to share any of it with anyone out of fear that they'll try to 'figure me out' in the hopes of 'helping' me." She actually did do the air quotes for the last two of those with either of her hands.

Water bottle was sat down on the bench beside her and she rested her arms acrossed atop her crossed legs. "We all know that Hulk is the sexist of us. Smell or not, those green muscles are enough to make me bust out of my blouse." She gave him another little grin.

"But anyway, yeah… you and I don't do well with free time. I buy motorcycles, you buy lambos and bimbos." She liked teasing him, it was hard not to do it, she'd been around so many military men for so many years that teasing and taking shots at each other, had been ingrained into her personality.


"I buy motorcycles too. I just haven't had much use for them since I started driving the Sky-Cycle. If you think a Lamborghini helps you pick up ladies, you should see me on the back of the 'Cycle."

S.H.I.E.L.D. agents and Avengers get all the best toys. Not including the purple action figures, obviously.

"Speaking of which, now that Doctor Aja has checked me out, I have the keys to the Sky-Cycle again. But Fury won't send me out on until we finish our readiness evaluation. So… what sort of horror did you have in mind for me? Keep in mind that I bruise easily."


Natasha smirked at his mention of the sky cycle. "Those things are death traps." And after a short pause she added. "Its probably I'm so eager for them to make more of them so we can all have our very own!"

"Fury conducted a raid on a chinese food restaurant three nights ago in Manhattan." Nat tells him then. "We apprehended a suspected Hydra boss, though he's not talking as of yet. We're giving him time to sit in isolation to think about what he's done." She showed a litlte smirk and glanced back at him.

"I think Fury is going to want you to get involved in on whatever other Hydra leads he has going on. Cap was there… without his shield or his costume… he looked as awkward and out of place as a duck in a bat cave." She eyed him while saying all of this.

"This is why I'm personally glad that you're back. Steve gets the job done, but he's… you know hwo he is, he needs his suit and toys and an army to lead, or he gets all awkward and mopey."


"Mopier than Fury in a Sunglass Hut?"

Clint backs away from Natasha a bit, to get enough room to stretch out. It's a good idea for everyone, but especially when you're starting to get Clint's age. Of course, he's way more flexible than you'd expect a guy who voted for Reagan to be. But he's been doing his very best to avoid getting a 'dad bod' for more than a decade.

Not that Natasha has noticed.

"Or mopier than Hulk in a Bath and Bodyworks?"


Natasha listened and watched… But she stood up after he said the holk joke and she walked over to a stand where there were a rack of heavy workout balls, various weights and sizes. She picked up a basketball sized one, it weighed about ten pounds and she walked back to him and shoved it at him.

"Toss this around for a little while, it'll help wake you up some." She said to him in a dry tone of voice. "So what do you want to do? Focus on that is… cardio or weights?" She walked back to the bench to get her water and to reach up to pull on her red curly ponytail that was sticking out of the back of her hat.

Turning back toward him with her water she smiled a little and moved to him again. "I'm eager to get you going, so we can just get out of here and do what you and I do best." She eyed him, leaving the 'whatever that is' up in the air for interpretation.



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